On Sunday we opened up our series looking at “Finding God on your iPod”. We began by discussing some of the different ways our culture views love.

There is the “Jerry Maguire” view. This is where we seek and find people who “complete us”. People who make up for our flaws and failures and make us feel whole and wonderful. The trouble with this view is that it’s ultimately self-centred. It’s about what someone else does for us (completes us).

The second view we looked at was what is called the Disney view. That when you meet the right person, you just live easy and breezy happily ever after. Johnathon Haidt says this about this type of love:

The modern myth of true love involves these beliefs: true love is passionate love that never fades; if you are in true love, you should marry that person; if love ends, you should leave that person because it was not true love; and if you can find the right person you will have true love forever.

And this too just isn’t true and not helpful.

The last view of love we looked at is what I called, Passive Love. This is the idea where it’s loving to let people do whatever they want, as long as they don’t hurt anyone. But again this is just selfishness clouded in love language.

That’s when we turned to Kings of Leon to give us a different view of love. We played the song Beautiful War, which has this wonderful little line:

            Love don’t mean nothing Unless there’s something worth fighting for. It’s a beautiful war.

And this line is just so true. And this view is actually right in line with the Biblical view of love that we looked at next. We looked at love as sacrifice, as fighting for someone, as dying for someone in John 3.

John says the message we have heard from the beginning in verse 11 is to love one another. John then goes on to define love, to not leave it vague and culturally bound. He says love looks like Jesus dying. Real love is Jesus giving up his life for us. Love is shown by actions, and it’s shown by sacrifice. Or as Kings of Leon put it, it’s not love unless you’re fighting for someone or something. Love is about sacrifice.

This led us to our main point of the day: fight for those you love. But not fighting in aggressive ways. But in ways that look a lot like dying, like Jesus Christ.

Richard Rohr says, Every time you choose to love, you have also just chosen to die. And that’s true.

So we ended with a simple but hard challenge. To fight for those you love. To really show your love to your spouse, to your kids, to those friendships that matter. To decide to really give of yourself to those around you. Because love is meant to be shown, and it needs to be – if it’s real love.

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: Fight for those you love.

Teaching Points:

  • Three types of love: You Complete Me, Disney, and Passive Love
  • Love don’t mean nothing, unless there is something worth fighting for. Kings of Leon
  • Love is the deepest truth…Love may cost you everything, but it is the only thing worth anything. Michael Gungor
  • Fight for those you love.
  • Love looks a lot like dying.
  • Every time you choose to love, you have also just chosen to die. Richard Rohr
  • Today we like to love until it hurts, Jesus says it’s not love unless it hurts.
  • Love is proved by deeds; the more they cost us, the greater the proof of our love. Mother Teresa.

Adult Discussion Questions:

What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it? What was new? Have you ever fallen into the trap of thinking about love like Disney, Jerry Maguire, or Tolerance? Who once really sacrificed themselves for you and it really changed you? What did it look like – how did they do it? Who are you maybe being called to love? How might you show them? Who can help you?

Discussion Questions for Young Families

Talk to your kids how love needs to be shown. How it needs to be proven through actions. Talk to them about people in your life, who you love. Ask them how you should show them love, and then do it.

Challenge for the Week: Fight for those you love.

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